Confidence and comparing with others
When it comes to confidence , no one not even alpha female Rihanna was born with it. CONFIDENCE is something achieved through weeks, months, years of training. FAKE IT Till YOU MAKE IT!
Stopp caring about what others think!
Even if you were perfect ( which is impossible) , people would have sth. to pick on you. Often they don´t even have the intention to hurt you, but they try to boost their confidence by projecting their own insecurities on you. Who says you cant go out with a crop top and a little tummy? Who says you cant go to dance classes even if you are in a wheelchair? Start dressing yourself in confidence every day and refuse to wear anybody else´s insecurities. Go out and show the warrior inside of you! When I was close to death I regretted the opportunities I hadn´t taken because I was afraid of what others think of me. But who am I living for? For them? Now I wear crop tops and bikinis and people came up to me and admired me for being strong and showing my scars. And for those who come across to pick on me : I am just sorry for you because you know what? Picking on others doesn´t make you prettier. Indeed it makes your character even uglier, so do the world a favor and shut up if you don´t have nothing nice to say and start working on your relationship with yourself.
Comparing yourself to others on IG
Personally I often find myself going down a spiral black whole on IG. First you find a picture of a cute girl , than you go through their IG page and find other beautiful women sitting on the beach seeming to have a perfect life. " If I had this body, I would be happy." " If I were her, I would be the happiest in the world." You catch yourself going in front of the mirror comparing yourself to those girls and end up being stuck in a mental state of persistent insecurity. But listen... you don´t want to switch lifes with them! You do not know what this girl is going through behind closed doors. Yes, they are pretty! But do you know who is also pretty? YOU. Someone elses light shining does not dim yours.
Use your brain!
When being stuck in feelings holding in for a second and finding rational arguments, always brings me down. Take your phone and look at it. See this little thing? Now compare it to the whole world and all the women living on it . IG is such a small representation of how a real women looks like. Don´t let this small world have such an huge impact on you. You want to compare yourself? Go out to the beach, have a look at your mother, your aunts even your neighbour. There are pregnant women out there and as a nurse I experienced women being upset about their stretchmarks. I have to stay professional but seriously. Your body just managed to carry out a new human being, it has been carrying your baby for 9 months and made sure it isnt malnurtured. How beautiful and stunning and you are here crying over stretchmarks one week after giving birth? Do you think your baby or your husband really care about that? NO!
Being Pretty
We are so worried about being pretty but from my experience the most beautiful people on earth are more likely to be single because guys are afraid of getting dumped and therefore they rather talk to someone "flawed" because their ego wouldn´t take being with someone more perfect, so they feel less worthy. Also being perfect is quiet boring. I like people with scars or physical disabilities because they have a story behind every "flaw" and I think that is beautiful. Listen! If you want to be pretty... why not being pretty kind, pretty funny, pretty smart or pretty strong! i can´t think of any better representation of beauty than someone who is unafraid to be herself.
Be a warm blooded animal !
Cold blooded and warm blooded what? A cold blooded animal relies on the outside to regulate their temperature. Kind of like Kylie Jenner with her self esteem ..needing constant feedback about herself and editing pictures of her plastic body because she doesn´t have this core of self esteem. But confidence is quite.. power is quiet... Rihanna is a warm blooded animal. She is not constantly posting pictures of her.. she doesn´t need validation to know - she is a bad bitch. Of course, she wasn´t born with it but in my opinion her persona shifted when she was beaten up by Chris brown. Now she knows her value and if a man doesn´t see it, she is like: " You can keep your attitude! Fuck it!" She definitely knows it and believe me . People start seeing your value by how you treat yourself!