When friends turn away ......

Recently a young man came to me and was depressed and disappointed because since his diagnosis a few months ago, many "friends" have turned away thinking that his illness is contagious. Others mocked him and made fun of his diarrhea .....  People he thought he could rely on. This reminded me of my time after my diagnose, but now I'm no longer upset when people turn away. I do not waste any unnecessary strength and time trying to maintain friendships, because in the end they are not permanent. I choose carefully who I trust, but don't hold onto anyone! Because if you want to stay, you stay out of your own conviction! Instead, I ask myself: are you the leaf, the branch or the root? There are three types of people in our lives.

Are you the leaf ?

The leaves are easily blown away by the  lightest wind. These are the short acquaintances, these are the people who are quickly gone. Be grateful for getting to know them! Be grateful for the experience! Be grateful for the short joy, for the emptiness, for the short pain, they brought you! Like the leaves of a tree, these people are beautiful and then they fall off. When we think about it , we all know such friends.

Are you the branch?

The second kind of people are like tree branches! You have to be careful with them because they can easily fool you. They pretend to be strong, but when you put the slightest pressure on them, they break easily and fall to the ground. We all know people who said they are going to be there for you, you could rely on them. "Call me when you need me!" But in the end these were all empty promises. There are moments in our lives when we were branches ourselves and moments when we were surrounded by branches. We have not kept our word because of our own weaknesses. In these moments we can grow and be more honest with ourselves and our fellow human beings.

 Are you the root ?

The third category is like the roots of a tree. These are the people who stay with us all their lives, no matter what. Who are going through hell with us! They don't blow away when something happens. A good friend knows all your stories, a best friend experienced them with you! In its lifetime, a tree can have millions of branches, hundreds of thousands of leaves, but few roots. A few roots that give the tree everything it needs! And when you find your roots, hold on to them. Keep your promises. Then stay true to you. You can give away the leaves and branches with a clear conscience.

That doesn't mean we don't need leaves and branches! As a tree needs them for photosynthesis to produce oxygen, the short-lived acquaintances are also important! They teach us, give us good but also bad experiences. Broaden our horizons and are an important companion for certain stages of life! So always remember: who are your leaves, your branches, your roots and for whom are you a branch, a leaf a root? You cannot change the people around you, but you can change which people are around you!